Making a life….not a Living

"Making a life, not a living" is a concept I first heard from the great Dr. Daniel Black on the Karen Hunter Show on SiriusXM. During the conversation, they explored the integrity—or lack thereof—behind how we choose to make a living. For me, I’ve always seen my job or career as a means to an end—a way to pay my mortgage, put food on the table, and indulge in my lifestyle. I’ve been fortunate enough to find work that I truly enjoyed, but even that wasn’t the whole story.

Making a life means creating space for myself to understand who I am, what I stand for, and what my values truly are. From a very early age, many of us are taught to tie our identity to what we do. One of the most common questions asked of children is, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Safe answers like “a doctor” or “a lawyer” often earn nods of approval or exclamations of “Wow!”—but such expectations can stifle imagination and shrink the realm of possibility. Making a life involves reclaiming that imagination and allowing ourselves to dream, create, and find purpose on our own terms.

Making a life also means nurturing relationships. Our connections with others open doors to parts of ourselves we didn’t know existed. Whether through a kind encounter with a stranger or a painful, gut-wrenching conflict with a family member, these interactions teach us how to process emotions and respond to the world around us. They serve as a mirror, showing us who we are and who we can become.

Making a life includes resting—taking the time to pause, travel, and experience the world. Meeting people from diverse backgrounds and genuinely learning about who they are has allowed me to reconnect with humanity in a world that often feels inhumane. These experiences also help me affirm my own humanity, reminding me of the beauty in shared stories and experiences.

Ultimately, making a life, not just a living, is about prioritizing growth as a person and embracing one’s humanity above all else. I admit, I’m an idealist—some might even call me delusional—but this perspective keeps me grounded. In a society where people are often devalued, choosing to value myself and my life feels like a revolutionary act.